Through Oceans Dark
by MerciaLachesis
Summary: The way Sakura goes from normal school girl to magical girl overnight (literally) is quite astonishing really. But really the way both Sakura and Syaoran go from the most powerful sorceress and heir to the Li Clan to lab rats overnight (literally) is a little more. (TW: character death, torture, implied suicide attempt, missing children) Rated T for themes, and language.


**A/N-Okay y'all, I wrote this 2 years ago on holiday and I found it just now. Pls don't judge the quality because honestly I just felt like posting and it was there so I thought why not? Anyways. Here's some pain.**

* * *

The way Sakura goes from normal school girl to magical girl overnight (literally) is quite astonishing really. But really the way both Sakura and Syaoran go from the most powerful sorceress and heir to the Li Clan to lab rats overnight (literally) is a little more. Or perhaps it isn't. After all, the way the world was going and the way the stars had aligned... Perhaps they should have been expecting it.

...It starts Friday night. Her and Syaoran are training in the woods nearby and Tomoyo's, sat in a tree and trying to get the best vantage point. It feels peaceful, it's too peaceful. Like this bliss has lasted too long.

It's a butterfly's wings. This is where it starts.

Or at least, this is when Sakura thinks it starts. The rest of its just a Rube-Goldberg Machine stemming from this... Or perhaps it's just a catalyst for the inevitable.)

Nonetheless, nobody thinks anything when they hear a rustle in the trees... Or when Sakura's cards say an earthquake is coming.

* * *

It feels like it's going to be a good day in spite of what her cards say. And honestly, she's really had enough of bad things happening. So against her better judgement, and Kero's protests and her own conscience, she leaves the cards at home before heading out to meet her friends. Maybe it's a little spite. She isn't too worried though.

After all, everything will definitely be okay.

...Except she doesn't make it to Tomoyo's house.

(she should have taken her cards.)

Kero is playing his favourite video game (he's finally made it to the boss level) when Touya storms in, face a wreck. He doesn't have time to play dead and just sits there, deer in the headlights.

"Oi." Says his mistress's brother, poking him with his big toe, "Where's Sakura?"

Kero isn't sure whether or not to respond for a moment. He does anyways. "With Tomoyo and Li."

"No. She isn't. Daidouji-san just called to ask. They were supposed to meet four hours ago. The brat isn't with Daidouji either."

Frowning, Kero pauses his game. "I'll go consult the cards... But I'm sure Sakura's fine, she's tough."

"Yeah I know."

In hindsight perhaps they should have doubted Sakura a little more. She doesn't come home that night, and according to Syaoran's butler(or whoever he is) neither did the Li boy. They find the Star Key in a bin the next day.

And the day after that 11 year olds Sakura Kinomoto and Li Xiao Lang officially become missing persons.

* * *

When Sakura wakes up she sees nothing and the emptiness around her neck reveals that her star key is gone. Presumably, she's in a truck or something because the ground is moving and there's an engine. And although she isn't wearing a safety belt, her whole body is strapped to a chair. Instinctively, she pulls at her restraints.

"The witch is up." Says a voice next to her, in some foreign accented Japanese. "Can you pass some more of the sedative?"

There's a rustle and a murmur and a sharp pinch at her neck before she's out again.

* * *

The next few hours are a cycle of semi consciousness and blacking out again. Half-functional Sakura is up enough to recognise she's going on a plane, a fancy private looking one. She also sees Syaoran in the corner of her eye, he's half drugged up as well.

An involuntary cry escapes from her lips. A plea perhaps. Idiot. Idiot. Idiot. She sees him snap his eyes wide open meeting hers desperately.

There's another prick in her neck. Once more the darkness comes.

* * *

They've been locked in the glass cages for about a few months perhaps, when Struckers's men haul two children into the cages next to her's and Pietro's. They're young, maybe eleven or twelve at most. Idly, Wanda wonders how long they'll last. She also wonders if they volunteered like they did... They don't look Sokovian though, Japanese or Chinese perhaps.

She and Pietro exchange wary looks from their opposite cages and shrug. Five hours, she signals with her fingers. He shakes his head. Four, he thinks.

Both of them are wrong . The two newcomers wake up six hours later, but Wanda was closer so she takes the victory. She wagers they'll last a week. Maybe two at most.

* * *

Sakura figures they've been here for about a week. There's another two people that have probably been kidnapped too, about seventeen or eighteen years old. They don't understand Sakura when she says hello, but she doesn't understand them either, although they do smile back when she smiles.

From her concrete and glass cage, she watches Syaoran take the hit with a grunt. "Sakura." he croaks, meeting her eyes desperately, "Everything definitely will be all right." He repeats her best friend's words; her mantra, her invincible spell. Sakura shakes her head sadly.

"Do you actually still think that, Syaoran-kun?"

He doesn't answer her.

* * *

Sakura doesn't think she's ever screamed so much in her life. Not when she discovered magic, not when she was kidnapped, not when she's being tortured. But something about seeing his pale form go limp and seeing him stop fighting. And when they zip up the body bag.

She screams herself raw. But she almost welcomes the burning throat, anything to distract from this pain, really. Because how can you distract yourself from someone you love being tortured to death, injected with monstrous drugs and dumped in acid? You can't. His face is too gone- deformed now even-that Sakura can hardly recognise it but it's his... Well not anymore. They don't belong to themselves anymore.

She wonders how long she'll last. How long she wants to last.

(She should have taken her cards.)

* * *

"-And now, the eleven year old heir of the Chinese Li Clan who was reported missing last month in Japan was genetically identified today. His body was found in a Russian landfill sight, face mutilated and several unknown substances found in his body. Scientists are still trying to figure out what exactly Mr Li Xiao Lang was subjected to. The child was reported missing last month along with classmate and friend, Miss Kinomoto Sakura, whose family reported the missing youths to the police. However, no news has been reported on Miss Sakura. Investi-"

Tomoyo switches the TV off before she can listen again. She doesn't think she can bare it anymore. After all Sakura was the strong one. Perhaps if she hadn't waited so damn long to call Touya…

According to the cards and Kero, Sakura's still alive. But for how much longer, she doesn't know.

Everything will be alright. Everything will be alright. Everything will definitely be alright.

Right?

* * *

"Hello." She speaks out loud in broken English, "My name is... Is Sakura Kinomoto." It sounds silly with her thick Japanese accent and Sakura had never been the best at English at school but she figures it's fine since they don't seem English either.

After a moment, the boy replies first. "Hello. I'm Pietro. Pietro Maximoff."

"Wanda Maximoff."

"How old are you?" She asks. Because really her English is very limited. "I am eleven years old."

"We are both around seventeen." Replies Wanda. "Did you Volunteer?"

"Vol-Lun-teer? I don't understand."

"Did you... Ask to come here?" It takes Sakura a moment before she strings the sentence together. She frowns, why would she?

"No... Syaoran-kun and I... Er... They er stole us? Yes they stole us." It's surprisingly easy to say his name, it rolls off the tongue nicely like nothing has changed. Somehow that hurts more. "Did you... Er, vol-teer? Vol-o-teer?"

They don't reply so Sakura fills in the gaps. None of this makes sense.

* * *

Sometimes when there's nothing to do except pass out or endure the pain, Sakura teaches them a little Japanese and they teach her Sovakian. A beautiful language really.

"Doctor," she asks one day, feeling either brave or careless "How long have I been here?"

He looks surprised for a moment, that she isn't spewing curses or screaming for once, but he also looks strangely pleased, but there's no harm in the question "Two months, darling." He replies, baring his gnarled teeth in some semblance of a smile. "The twins have been here for about half a year now."

She nods, relaxing her muscles for the needle. It's no use to fight anymore. She'll just get hurt more and she isn't so far gone that she doesn't know what's good for her. The serum, or whatever poison it is, is already burning through her veins, like liquid fire, acidic flames licking beneath her skin softly. Closing her eyes, she lets out an incoherent groan. But it doesn't hurt like before.

Dr Strucker observes her for a moment, standing back as though admiring a painting in a gallery. She shivers.

"All the others didn't last." He adds snidely.

It's funny though(well kind of). Sakura should be terrified of this, but instead she's just so angry. This man refers to people like they're food to be thrown away, burnt or expired... How dare he!? But Sakura can't even clench her fists, so instead she just lies there, imagining just what she would do if the tables were turned.

(Not much, though. Sakura isn't like him.)

* * *

Sakura misses her home. She misses her family; Tomoyo, Kero-Chan, Touya, her father, her classmates. Her cards. This is her fault. Because, damn it, if she had just listened. If she had just listened to her cards, to Kero... Maybe she wouldn't be here. Maybe she'd be with her family still making that balancing act between normal school girl and the most powerful sorceress.

Who knows what's happening to her family now?

Back then, her biggest problems had been political Li Clan issues. And now...

(Maybe Li Xiao Lang, her Syaoran, wouldn't be dead.)

This is her fault.

* * *

Back in Japan, alone in his kitchen, Fujitaka Kinomoto says a silent prayer for his missing child and whispers "Happy Birthday" to his little girl.

And Touya looks at the visage of his mother and prays and asks and receives no answer.

* * *

"Why did you volunteer for this?" Sakura asks one day. The question has been circling her mind lately, now that there's not much to think about. After all, Wanda and Pietro seem like nice people, why would they...?

"Revenge." Says Pietro at last. "Sokovia isn't on the news often, I'll bet. We're at war with ourselves. An American weapon killed our family and a bunch of scientists tell us we can help the situation? It's a done deal." He laughs hollowly. The twins used to tiptoe around their situation when they talked, Sakura had figured they didn't want to expose her mind to the whole situation. It was understandable. But now they don't hold back, they understand that Sakura understands.

Wanda just hums in agreement, sounding defeated. Which she is. They all are.

* * *

After the next two weeks, they barely call on her. Perhaps they're waiting for her to flush out the chemicals they've injected into her or maybe they're waiting for her to absorb it. Whatever it is, she has nothing to do. So, after a while, she starts counting the days.

On the very corner of her cell, underneath her mattress (because they've allowed her, at least, that much luxury), she bites her finger. Bites it until she starts to taste the metallic tang of her own blood. Then in kanji, she writes.

"2 months." and starts with one tally mark. There's still a little blood left on her finger so she uses it to draw a smiley face.

* * *

It's both incredible and horrifying when she finally realises what these experiments have all lead up to.

She can see the miracles happening on the other side of the glass, in the twin's cages.

Wanda who emits a red glowy aura and can do as she pleases with her surroundings, making the tennis ball they've given her float and rip itself to shreds only to re-stitch itself back together. She sees Wanda's red glow touch the temple of the guard who brings them dinner, and sees his eyes go blank and sees him shoot the other guy. Two other men are killed before he is.

She sees Pietro ramming himself into the walls and into the glass pane at inhuman speeds, unable to keep still. She sees Pietro's mattress whole and usable one second and turned to dust and fluff, threads that rains down in his room the next. He sees a guard shoot at Pietro only for him to quite literally catch the bullet with his teeth and hurl it back at him. The bullet hits the guard's head and he dies.

And when she closes her eyes, it's not magic she senses. That makes it scarier, because she doesn't know what it is.

* * *

Sakura reckons she's been here for just over a year now. Perhaps it's the pain or maybe whatever it was they fed her yesterday is finally working but she's sitting on that damn electric chair again when, at last, something within her snaps.

Sakura only sees hot white for a second and her whole body feels like it's been dunked in ice water. Momentarily, she loses control of her organs and limbs, and all she can do is feel. Feel her body fit and flip like a fish out of water, and her heart pump more heavily than she's ever felt it before, seizing, and her brain heat up in contrast to her ice-cold body.

Then, everything stops. Sakura comes back around, the dust and ashes after an explosion, and she sees the looks of astonishment from the scientists and hears the gasps and murmurs.

When she looks down at her body, she doesn't see flesh or skin. She sees metal. Shiny and smooth and silver and not human. Not a body, not even a corpse.

She might vomit.

But she can't because she's this…. Thing, and because there's nothing to vomit.

Instead, she just passes out.

* * *

When she wakes up in her concrete cell, her skin is made of concrete. When she touches the glass window, she clears to hard, icy glass. But when they hesitantly leave a cup of water and she becomes water after a sip, she wonders morbidly if they separated her body and made her out of flesh again, if she'd die.

She's not so lucky.

* * *

It takes another two days before she regains enough control over herself to turn back into herself again and touch things without turning into them. But she doesn't eat her meals for another day for fear she'll turn into that grey sludge they feed them.

So far she's managed to turn herself to glass, concrete, water, air (which happened out of some weird curiosity), cloth (which happened accidently from her tattered clothing) and a cheap brittle plastic (which is from the plastic spoons and bowls and cups they use to feed her).

She thinks she might be dreaming when she sees skin, her real skin, for the first time. Rubs it against her cheek and feels the microhairs and the skin cells and her nails. She cries and vomits and tries as hard as she can, not to touch anything else.

This time, when she makes herself bleed, it is not to count the days (there's no point anyway) but to end them.

(But she still wakes up with stitches over her veins and she still turns to glass and air and metal, and she still cannot cry.)

* * *

It's useless to try and get out. Sakura knows this. Even with her newfound 'abilities' she can't do anything. It's useless. It doesn't stop them from trying though, even if it means they'll get punished worse.

Wanda is the first to give up. Maybe because her abilities are more mentally draining than anything. Then herself. Pietro doesn't stop though, not even when they beg him to. Not even when his sister begs him to.

They receive one meal a day now. When they wake up there's a bowl of the grey stuff and a cup of water since they aren't going to risk giving them their meals conscious.

* * *

It's been over year and a half since Touya last saw his little sister. "She's alive." Keroberos repeats every day. Every day it's the same. Touya isn't sure if knowing she's alive is any better than not knowing at all.

Despite everything, he's still attending college, going to night classes, so he can work and gather any scraps of information from a trail long gone cold, during the day. His dad insists on it, even though dad is only working part time nowadays too.

But… the brat Li couldn't last two months and he was disfigured beyond repair, tortured, injected with freakish drugs and burned, apparently, with acid. And now he's buried in the ground. Some graveyard in China probably. At this rate, he's not sure if he wants to know how Sakura is. He probably wouldn't even recognise her. The thought makes him feel physically sick. She should be starting middle school now. She should be cheer captain and complaining over maths and going on school camp.

And damn it - she should be here, at home, with her father and her brother. With him.

"You're so protective of your sister!" his classmates used to squeal an age ago. It's been a year and a half but it feels like a decade since he's heard anything other than, "I'm sorry." He snorts. Well it didn't do her any fucking good when it mattered now did it?

Those that don't know about magic think he's in denial when he insist, "She's alive. My sister's alive." He'll receive a gentle pat on the back and pitying looks n return. He doesn't want their pity, he wants his sister. Safe. Happy. Healthy. By his side.

He barely sees Yuki, nowadays. Most of the time he's off searching for his sister. And when he does visit it's not Yuki but Yue talking in hushed private tones with Keroberos about his sister, conversations that he's not privy to.

The people that grabbed her were certainly professionals, though. The CCTV recording that they're been given cuts off just as Sakura appears into the frame and comes back ten minutes later with everything looking peachy.

Some days, Touya wants to give up. But he can't. She's out there, somewhere. Alive. Even just barely. And he'll finder her even if it destroys him.

* * *

Sakura remembers the day clearly. The day her cellmates were released, but she kept hidden. Those famous American heroes that Kero-chan used to boast that he alone could take on, came.

There had been panic and chaos everywhere and in a final act of desperation Dr Strucker had said to "release the twins".

Sakura had caught Wanda's eye as she walked out of that cage, almost free, and rather selfishly said, "Come back for me?" Before Pietroher had whizzed her away.

There are several explosions and the lights go out. She hears the crashing of the above building crumbling and collapsing, but she's too far down for it to reach her.

And then silence. Pure, empty, silent darkness.

Everything definitely will be all right. Everything definitely will be all right. Everything definitely will be all right.

Honestly, she doesn't really believe that anymore but at this point it's like a reflex, this 'invincible' spell.

After several hours she thinks, maybe Wanda didn't hear her after all.

* * *

Steve isn't sure why the twins want to go back to the compound so soon, as though they have some kind of attachment to it. They aren't allowed though. They have a few tests to go through and they're making it worse by refusing the doctors. Not that he can blame them. They're obviously still traumatized and if they can't trust people in white lab coats then it's hardly their fault. And if every time someone other than each other get too close they flinch, or if they can't hear the sound of running water or the hiss a frying pan or look at a syringe without being triggered, then that isn't their fault either.

They're only kids after all. And they were stuck in that prison for two years having unspeakable things done to them.

"Please." Begs Wanda, "We have to go back." She looks so desperate he isn't sure how to respond for a second. Why?

"No." He says seriously, "It isn't safe for you two to leave yet."

Beside her, Pietro raises a brow. "So you're keeping us prisoner here." He doesn't have to add like them, for Steve to get the message.

He sighs, this is gonna be difficult. "Look. Why d'you even want to go back anyway? It's basically a wreckage now. If there's something there that you need, we'll handle it."

The twins exchange nervous glances, having some sort of silent conversation. Steve waits politely until Pietro just nods.

"Not something." begins Wanda anxiously, "Someone."

When he calls the Avengers, the twins and Maria to an emergency meeting he's a little more disgusted at the fact that HYDRA have got their hands on a twelve year old girl, and she's only twelve because she's already been there for over a year.

"She's only twelve." says Wanda dutifully. "She's Japanese with light brown hair, quite short."

"And uh, does she have any… powers?" asks Tony strangely delicately for him.

"Yeah. They developed not too long ago like maybe two or three months?" Pietro replies. "She can basically turn into anything she touches. Like metal or water or air."

Steve watches as everyone notes this all down, and then they suit up.

"We'll bring her back." is all he says. But the compound has been down for over three days by now and so finding her gone or dead won't come as a surprise.

* * *

Sakura's been sitting alone in this darkness for at least three days now. She's sure of it. She doesn't know why or how she's sure of it, but she is. Perhaps she's dead. After all, she can see nothing, hear nothing. It's slowly suffocating her. But when she tests out her croaky voice, it sounds too loud and echoes a bit too much to be the void that is death. And besides, she can still feel her tattered clothes and the cold concrete floors.

If only she had a light. If only she had her cards. If only she wasn't alone. She can't even see her own body.

Sakura thinks she might actually go insane from this nothingness.

That's all it is. Darkness. Silence. Darkness. Silence. Darkness. Silence.

Darkness.

Silence.

Funny, Sakura never used to be afraid of the dark. But it's overwhelming her and there's nothing else so she can't ignore it.

Blackness. Emptiness. Silence. Darkness. Nothingness. She's sick of it but it's drowning her. She can breathe but she can't, every breath is too shallow.

She's alone with not even her sight or her hearing for company.

God she just wants to go home.

Her body isn't faring well either; she's starving and severely dehydrated and it's freezing.

Even in dreams it's dark. There's no difference between sleep and reality.

Darkness.

Silence.

She isn't sure when she hears the sound and what looks like the light of a flashlight. Perhaps she's hallucinating. It's seems likely to be honest. Or maybe it's HYDRA coming back to retrieve their goods. Whatever it is, against her better judgement and perhaps because she's so utterly deprived of any form of human contact or anything other than darkness and silence and her own useless thoughts, Sakura feels her frail body fling itself against the glass.

"HERE!" She screams, using the last of her energy, her throat raw and coarse like sand. "HELP!"

The darkness that comes with losing consciousness isn't as deep as the darkness of her prison, she finds, so she welcomes it.

* * *

When she wakes up the light is blinding. It takes about five whole minutes for her eyes to finally adjust to the bright white non-darkness. Strangely, even though she's not in her cage, she isn't restrained. Slowly, she tries to prompt herself to sit up. She's unsuccessful however. At the other side of the room, there's several scientists or doctors and she feels herself flinch away. There's an IV attached to her arm and clear fluid seeping into her, her tattered HYDRA issued clothes are replaced with a hospital gown and the hospital bed she's lying in actually feels comfortable. After a minute or two, she decides to test out her voice.

"Whe-." she coughs and tries again, louder. "Where am I?"

She doesn't get an answer however, but they all turn to look at her and a few murmurs are passed around before one of them disappears out the room. Sakura waits patiently and a few minutes later Wanda and Pietro burst through the door.

"Where am I?" She asks again.

They look at her carefully and kindly. "We're with the Avengers. We're safe."

She's about to ask what happened when her eyes drift shut again and she's under. At least this time it isn't so dark.

* * *

There's no one in the house but him when they get the call. It's around ten in the morning and Kero's sleeping in again, though he sleeps in Touya's room now with the cards because it just feels less empty when you know someone's coming home to it.

It rings about four times before he finally relents and picks up, settling the phone beside him and answering.

"Kinomoto residence." He says deepening his voice, trying to imitate either Touya or his father. "How can I help?"

There's a momentary pause on the other end and the obvious sound of passing over the phone before he gets a reply. "Are you Kinomoto Fujitaka?" Says a voice. Though the person speaks Japanese they're words sound strange and accented, they're probably American or Russian, he presumes.

"This is a friend." He says carefully, sitting up. He has a strange feeling about this. "Can I pass him a message for you?"

Another pause, longer this time, and a muffled discussion. "No. We will call him via mobile. Thank you for your concern."

He hears the beep signalling the end of the call before he has time to protest. Whatever it was, though, he's got a feeling it was important.

Twenty minutes later, Kero hears the front door slam open downstairs and the sound of heavy footsteps running up the stairs. He hears Sakura's father speaking in frantic tones to the phone and the sound of him opening his office door and shovelling through files and papers.

"- Touya come home now-"

"...I'm not sure who it was but they said they're with those American Avengers and it didn't seem like a joke..."

"...Whatever just come home. You need to pack your stuff..."

He doesn't hear anymore after that because the office door clicks shut. What is happening? There might be a pretty good idea of what it is in his head but he's not willing to get his hopes up.

Another fifteen minutes later, Kero jumps as Touya bursts into the room. Their eyes meet for a second before Touya breathes out, "They've found her. She's alive. They've found her."

Almost immediately his world feels again.


End file.
